Post-Graduation Stress Disorder

Umm…my underage freshman year

I don’t remember this but look how young y’all look (and Hank shaved for the occasion)

This is the more typical Hank look

When ya’ll lived at Duren, and it snowed that year. 500 car accidents the next day.

Typical Waterford shenanigans

Football season – of course never Hank or Shakshi

Yep, we outlasted y’all…

…rising seniors (the new Plastics) who learned from this group to not take things too seriously and simply enjoy being students at THE greatest university on earth \m/

Danny Zeng | May 22, 2013

I spent the last week or so with some of my closest friends in college. Many have graduated over the weekend. Yes I’ll admit it. Part of me feels sad, but it is in the selfish sense that I know that they won’t be around next year for me when I need them (and yes, that’s what true friends are for; they are the chosen family, support system, the wolf pack, insert your own descriptive phrases that capture the same sentiment). Another part of me simply feels numbing: perhaps it’s the drag of the school year, pending end-of-the-semester to-do lists, the stress of dysfunctional politics – OK it’s probably just me…, or simply fatigue and lethargy. I have been sleep deprived from playing way too much Nintendo 64 – that one of us purchased from a Craigslist guy (mhmm) – where I played more tennis (umm Mario tennis)  than all the years I’ve been in college.  My sleep schedule has been more off-cycle than usual as result of 1) absentmindedly pushing to maximize my time with my graduating seniors; and 2) obsessively glued to Netflix watching House of Cards (that will be a different post in and of itself). I’ve been undoubtedly gaining weight due to poor diet and little exercise, which probably contributed to my general fatigue. This reminds me the importance of self-care for all my graduating seniors! Please eat healthy, exercise often, and sleep plenty. Your health is your seed capital for success in the enterprise of life.  I think the most apt description of my current state of mind is faithful optimism, simply having faith in the notion that people and things will turn out to be OK.

My friend walks across stage for her graduation in Government

A roaring sea of black gowns and decorated caps, competitive rounds of whoas and ahhhs for graduates walking across stage, chatty professors in their scholastic robes, clacking of high heels (or the swag of boots trotting about ), layers upon layers of makeup –  for the gazillion amateur clicks of professional camera shutters, the pestering yet loving entourage of parents, siblings, extended families and friends, the dormant yet nonetheless tangible mixed emotions of happiness, apprehension, relief, earned success, camaraderie, reciprocity and gratitude have all filled the sultry summer air on commencement night with heavy hearts.

Longhorn families

Think about all the people who ever supported our grads, financially, emotionally, and psychologically. For some, their kids’ graduation from college is the last chapter in what sometimes seems to be a never-ending, very sad, handwritten book (…)  With two decades of hard work behind them in raising these graduates, a million-dollar investment, the parents, no doubt, becomes highly emotional during this thoroughfare. After all, college graduation serves as the closure. In fact, if you’d have the same opportunity of witnessing more than 10,000 people sharing that moment together like I did at the UT Austin commencement, then you’d appreciate the rational ubiquity of emotional outbursts.

Commencement 2013 at the University of Texas at Austin | May 18th, 2013

The minute the fireworks shot up into the Austin sky, my heart skipped a beat, and my eyes grew watery. Can this be it for my friends? It seems only yesterday when I met each and every one of them. Those moments of fateful encounters – some might say chance occurrences, but I never found that proposition convincing – seem so removed from the larger reality of graduation, a milestone, a crown achievement, a relief, a “meh.” “One more year this will be me,” I thought. I wondered what each of them was thinking at the time. In the back of my mind, I was thinking, “graduation can’t all just be the rah-rah cheers, fancy restaurants, loud music, and bottomless shots (well…)”

That moment – that night really – I realized what a true excitement it is for the University to graduate more than 8,000 Longhorns into the world to change it for the better! This is a cause for celebration! Graduates are challenged with the task to do just that: make the world a better place. Or in the case of UT, “to transform lives for the benefit of society.”  I can’t wait to see what each of them will accomplish in the near and distant future. Among my circle of graduating seniors, there will be a lawyer, a doctor, an educator, an engineer, a business analyst, and a community leader. Each has the ability, the heart, and the humor to change the world in his/her own way. How ordinary an occurrence but extraordinary a thought!

I have nothing but the best wishes and my most deep-felt prayers for each of them as they enter the real world. It will be an adventure of a lifetime, literally. Like I alluded before, I don’t believe in chance encounters. I fundamentally believe there is a reason that God has put them in my life. I believe God has a purpose for each one of them. And I believe that God will care for and guide them through life’s many trials. Not only do I believe so, I know so. My faith gives me both optimism and relief: I know they are in good hands. These people are my chosen family in college. They will remain my chosen family in life and for life. I am sincerely excited and extremely optimistic for this group of passive-aggressive jokesters, high achievers, and leaders. The first generation of Waterford crowd had graduated. I shall leave them all with the following passage from one of my favorite Dr. Seuss books, Oh the Places You’ll Go!,  that my fifth grade teacher had once read to us 🙂 –  you’d never go wrong re-reading Dr. Seuss.

Rockstars

On and on you will hike
and I know you’ll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You’ll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You’ll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life’s
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never forget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

To answer my own question, of course, this is not it for my friends. They have a long way to go. There will be lots of excitements, triumphs, disappointments, and yes failures; but the joy of friendship will live on. And just for the record: I don’t really suffer from post-graduation stress disorder (this is not real). I’m simply trying to treasure and preserve the memories that I’ve made with these peeps over the last few years. For these grads – Hank, Shakshi, Wesley, Nayana, Katie, and Simon – who are already changing the world and will continue to do so, I am faithfully optimistic.

Love,

Danny

Summer Orientation #2: Wing Men

Last week I got my my first residential wing for this summer. There were 22 guys in my wing – they named themselves the Wing Men…it was a huge shift from working at family orientation – chitchatting with parents  to having a residential wing, where I had the opportunity of helping orientees more individually. I enjoyed the diversity within the group; each student was unique and peculiar in his own way. About half participated fully during orientation. They were a mix batch of guys from East Texas, Arlington, the Valley, Houston area, and yes, out of state (Florida). From small towns to big cities, they come to UT majoring in business, communication studies, liberal arts, engineering, theater, music, natural sciences, and undeclared. They have different ideas, expectations, anxieties and excitements about college. The common bond of being in the same boat not knowing exactly what’s coming their way fuels much of the bonding experience. Seeing how nascent friendships form in a short three-day span is one of the most amazing and rewarding experiences being an orientation advisor. Going to the shows with them, staying up until 4:30 am to help them with picking out courses for their first semester, eating breakfast with them on the morning of registration, and small moments and encounters along the way have made me realize something incredible: I was just one of them two summers ago. I sat in the same auditorium and watched the same social justice show. I went to the awkward dance party. I [stupidly] explored evening off-campus activities…I still remember faces from my orientation. And now the table has turned: being able to serve in an advisory/mentoring role for my orientees have made me think more about my own college experience, my love for this university, and my hopes and dreams for my own future. In a way, I drew inspirations from my orientees about getting excited about what’s coming at you, even when you yourself have much doubts about the future. Sometimes, trusting the process and allows things to be – an anathema to someone who is structured and prefers a plan – may not be a bad blueprint for life after all. 

Summer Orientation #1: Day 1 June 6-8 Session

Today starts the hectic ride of summer orientation here at the University of Texas at Austin. I am fortunate to be one of the 90+ orientation advisors for the new incoming Class of 2016. The last two weeks have been a whirlwind of workshop rehearsals – for our student-run orientation shows – information sessions with administrative offices across campus, and logistical planning and training. All of this on top of one semester of course training on social justice, institutional history of UT, transition into college, facilitation, etc. Needless to say, we are more than prepared for the task ahead. My aunt in China emailed me yesterday to congratulate me for being on the Dean’s Honor List for McCombs this past semester. I wrote her back today (in Mandarin!) and told her how excited I am for being part of summer orientation. About 1,200 new students will be here on campus for this first session. They along with their families will be arriving on campus 7 am! They have a long day ahead of them, so do I. I am assigned to Family Orientation for tomorrow, so I suppose I get to mix and mingle with parents, who will be no doubt freaking out about leaving their students behind. The New Student Services staff “graduated” all of the orientation advisors yesterday and dubbed us as the “OA Class of 2012.” I admire my fellow Orientation Advisors (OAs) so much for all they have done in preparation for today’s occasion. The behind-the-scene work is extremely taxing, tedious, and demanding. Some of my fellow OAs have devoted hours upon hours in rehearsing for the shows that they have originally written, staged, and directed. Their dedication has never ceased to amaze me and has been a constant source of inspiration for me. I feel extremely proud and blessed to be part of this unique, loving family of OAs. Check back for more Summer Orientation updates from my blog. 

Hook ‘Em! m/

Commencement: Congratulations to the Class of 2012!

http://www.utexas.edu/know/2012/05/22/commencement_gates/

Last saturday, I drove three hours back to Austin in order to participate in the University’s 129th Commencement Ceremony to watch one of my best friends and my roommate graduating and walking in cap and gown through the University’s South Mall.

The day was hectic. I woke up around noon. I rushed out the house around 2pm in order to avoid traffic going into Austin and make it on time to Commencement. On the way back, I listened to two podcast installments from the Harvard’s Kennedy School of Government – one on “Campaign 2012” and another on “conservatism and why we need it now” by Andrew Sullivan – the latter piece was particularly interesting, considering Andrew Sullivan makes an argument along the lines that the ideological conservatism is in crisis. Conservatism is supposed to preserve society for what it is and not to impose man-made solutions to all problems. Formulaic solutions are not going to work because human conditions change. Sullivan, himself identified as gay, argues that Obama is the most conservative politician in the United States and the Republican Party fails to carry the conservative banner for the movement – quite interesting. I think he has a point, though I am not ready to dwell on it in this post.

In any event, I got back to Austin around 5, unloaded my bags at my apartment and made my way to campus for Commencement Ceremony. I was dazed by the grandiosity of the whole ceremony. Lots and lots of family members were seated on the lawn under the Tower. Graduates were in cap and gowns – some decorated their caps with personal interests. Faculty and administrators were present to celebrate alongside the graduates. There were fancy lighting, music, poignant speeches from students, and then there was Secretary Robert Gates’s keynote speech on how graduates should think more highly and seriously about public service. Secretary Gates is one of those politicians I greatly admire and respect. During his keynote, Sr. Gates framed that we live in a time of “great necessities.” As the former Secretary of Defense overseeing both the Iraq and the Afganistan wars, he deployed thousands of troops, many of whom were young men and women from 18-25. I was particularly inspired by his call for all graduates to serve our country in all capacities. I imagine many of my peers share my apprehension about serving in the public sector, when there are attractive job positions in Fortune 500 companies out there, especially many opportunities in the McCombs School of Business. I do have a desire to serve someday in some capacity. I have a strong desire to help as many people as I can in my lifetime. In a way, Commencement for the Class of 2012 served as a signpost, a guide for how I want to pursue the latter half of my college career here on the Forty Acres. It made me think more about who I am and what I want to do with my own life. The almost surreal ceremony was topped off with fireworks and “Eyes of Texas.” As a longhorn, nothing could get better than seeing other longhorns accomplish so much in so little time with diverse talents, ambitions, and dreams. I feel blessed to go to one of the best public universities in the country, in terms in value, quality, and amount of opportunities. I am thrilled for my junior year starting in the fall. I will keep you updated on my academic life throughout this process.